Contracts and Families
by scaryfangirl2001
Summary: Phineas and Candace learn about their biological dad and the Flynn-Fletcher kids go to live with him when Lawrence and Linda are forced to move for a job. Human!Perry Human!Norm
1. Chapter 1

[[Despite this being a bit AU, these characters belong to the minds of Dan Povenmire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh. Sorry, I have no credit - except for the plotline and AU idea. ?]]

Heinz Doofenshmirtz hasn't been creating any grand inventions lately, aside from his constant struggle of finding a way to rid the town of their beloved mayor. It seems his brother cannot do anything wrong in the eyes of the citizens of Danville, or of their mother. Heinz's daughter Vanessa has even unfortunately witnessed the cruelty her uncle possesses. He has sold many of his old inators and is now well off enough to become landlord to his building. On the evil side of things, he hikes up the prices for the residents while paying nearly nothing for the top two floors: his lab and apartment.

Meanwhile, Lawrence Fletcher has arrived home with big news: he's got a promotion. The bad news, it is in another city halfway across the country. Phineas and Ferb, ten, are upset about leaving their friends - particularly Isabella, Buford and Baljeet. Candace, sixteen, doesn't want to leave because this is where she met her best friend Stacey and boyfriend Jeremy. Perry, seventeen, complains about his martial arts classes - which in reality is a cover story to fight Doofenshmirtz.

Unfortunately, the Flynn-Fletchers need the money, as evident by the boys' lack of extravagant creations. They have kept close to home lately, using simple methods to make a few fun games or home movies. Candace had run out of bustable events and gone on more outings with her friends. Perry had brought in extra cash, considering he is actually an agent, not a student. He simply had been sliding some into their individual accounts ever so often so the family wouldn't get suspicious.

The decision has been made and the kids are left to pack. Their friends - Isabella, Stacey, Pinky and such - offer assistance, obviously upset over the whole ordeal. Meanwhile, Heinz actually creates a skunk-inator, a ray that will make whatever it hits stink up a place. He sends his "son" Norm to his room after a while, getting angry about his 'nemesis' not arriving. After another hour, he calls OWCA for information.

"Hello, Major Monogram's office. Carl speaking."

"Ugh, the intern." Heinz groans. "Where is Perry the Platypus?"

"Doctor D!" He sounds surprised. "Err, uh, Agent P is uh,"

"Out with it." Heinz is greatly irritated and Carl really isn't helping.

"Agent P is moving."

"What!? Where?"

"I, uh, err." Carl hangs up.

Heinz glares at the phone for a moment longer, then lets out a yell and slams the phone down. Norm calls for him but Heinz demands he stay in his room. The man grabs his cell and keys, stopping by his daughter's bedroom only to leave her in charge of her "brother." He heads out the door, dialing a number he hasn't thought about in years.

++ EIGHTEEN YEARS AGO ++

Heinz is dating Charlene, not because he is in love with her, but because she is approved. Her parents don't like him. They don't mind him, but they don't like him. Roger likes Charlene though, which is the main reason Heinz wants to marry her - so his brother can't have her. Both Heinz and Charlene are in college, though different colleges. Though he is dating Charlene, he also has a crush on his best friend Linda.

Linda supports him through thick and thin and he strives to do the same for her. Heinz, Linda and Linda's neighbor Kylie are always hanging out together outside of class. They have so much in common with each other - like their tastes for adventure. Not to mention, they all excel at the sciences and love to build things out of nothing. They are eighteen and living life in the fast lane.

Heinz had a rough upbringing but he can put it away when with his friends. In fact, that is another thing they all have in common. Linda's family is dirt poor but they are slowly progressing. Kylie and her family have moved to America from a low point in Australia, so she can have a better life. Kylie is now with her boyfriend Perris, who treats her like a queen. Linda is single and often has Heinz as her plus one to social events.

A few months later, while Kylie is pregnant, she and her friends get word that Perris had been killed in a train wreck. Two trains had gotten hijacked and gone into a collision course, killing a dozen and seriously injuring many. Linda and Heinz had stepped in, helping her through the rest of her pregnancy. Less than a year later, Kylie gives birth to a baby boy. She names him Bartholomew (the name she and Perris had already agreed on) Perris Macala.

A few weeks later, it is Bartholomew's first Christmas. Linda and Heinz are with him and Kylie, while Charlene wants nothing to do with it. Yet, he sees Charlene the week after, and they have a "proper" Christmas celebration. She takes him out of the country to a skiing lodge somewhere in Europe. When he returns, Linda is waiting for him with impatient news: she is pregnant, and it is his kid. He isn't sure what to do, but assures her he will help look after the child.

Only a month later, near Valentine's Day, Charlene reveals she is also pregnant and they must marry at once. Heinz tries to explain the events to Linda. Luckily, she is patient and is willing to overcome the obstacles. When Heinz explains the circumstances to Charlene, she ups the wedding date and they are to be married in March. Come August, Linda gives birth to a baby girl and Heinz is there to share the experience. Heinz's only request is that the baby has a strong Latin name. As such, she is named Candace Gertrude Flynn..

Two months later, Charlene also gives birth to a baby girl. Heinz, once more is there, asking for the same assurance. Instead, Charlene is determined not to give in and would rather name her daughter after her favorite author, Vanessa Grant. Vanessa Igraine Doofenshmirtz. Unknown to Charlene, "Vanessa" actually is a Latin name. Heinz lives up to his word, and continues to shower both kids with affection, hardly seeing any of Bartholomew and Kylie - except for birthday parties.

When Vanessa is five, Charlene and Heinz get a divorce, unable to put up with the charade any longer. Heinz attempts to get back with Linda, and she winds up pregnant once more. Nine months later, Linda is in labor. Unfortunately, Bart and his mom are involved in a terrible accident by a railroad track. Kylie had been able to move her son out of the way and take the brunt of the incident. Heinz sticks by Kylie at the hospital, while Bart is taken by his grandma (Kylie's mother-in-law). Kylie doesn't make it and Bart is sent to live with his Gammy. Linda, on the other hand, has a son. She names him Phineas Clyde Flynn.

Bart no longer wants anyone to call him that, since his mom had been known to call him "Li'l Barty." He attempts to have his Gammy call him Perris, but it only causes her to cry and think of her own son. Instead, he develops the nickname Perry. She gives him a 1940's fedora his dad used to have as a teenager, and he wears it with pride. Charlene and Heinz have shared custody of six-year-old Vanessa, and she will stay with either parent every two weeks.

Heinz lives in the suburbs, just three houses down from the Flynns. While looking after the little tykes one afternoon, Candace had curiously toyed with some strange mechanical device in Heinz's broom closet, causing a chain reaction to go off around the house. Though no one had been hurt, Linda decides to set up a shared custody agreement, much like Charlene's. Heinz agrees to sign it, though with a bit of underhanded evil. Candace and Phineas will see Heinz every two weeks, alternating with Vanessa, as long as both parties remain in Danville. If one of them (meaning Heinz or Linda) should directly pack up and move to another state or country without any intention of returning (moving back) in over four years, the children (Candace and Phineas) will stay with the parent remaining in Danville.

Linda has no problem signing this and does so. Two years later, Charlene drops Vanessa off with Heinz to go be with her sister in a neighboring state, who is having a baby. Heinz obliges, happy to spend time with his growing eight-year-old daughter. Things aren't bright for too long, however, and trouble brews in Gimmelshtump. He regretfully leaves Vanessa with Linda and heads for Europe.

He returns three years later, after settling a large dispute his brother had unintentionally caused. Vanessa is now eleven, thinking her father's abandoned her. Charlene's sister had been the victim of a home invasion and Charlene is now in custody of three-year-old Norm - Vanessa's cousin-turned-brother. Defeated, Heinz tries for Linda, only to discover she's married a man last year. Lawrence Fletcher and his five-year-old son Ferb have joined the family. The contract remains intact, with an additional clause. Now, because of the recent marriage, Linda and Lawrence may take custody of the kids (Candace and Phineas), but only if she remains in Danville. Move away, and the kids will fall into Heinz's custody until her return.

The next year, Gammy has a heart attack and doesn't make it. Linda quickly acts in, adopting thirteen-year-old Perry as her own. Perry doesn't talk, as he is devastated. He barely recalls Linda and Candace from when they were toddlers. Unfortunately, with Candace getting older, she doesn't have time for her family. Linda works a lot, so the kids are left home with Lawrence. Perry doesn't necessarily trust them, so he usually either stays in his room or wanders around the neighborhood.

A year later, the family learns sign language, since Perry still refuses to talk. He continues to wear his dad's fedora. The closest he gets to speaking is a little chirr when he needs to gain someone's attention, and a soft purr he emits when satisfied. One summer day, while Candace is at the mall and the boys are building something in the backyard, Perry wanders into town. He runs into a seventeen-year-old redhead with glasses at the local arcade. He is stumped at a game and Perry signs if he can try.

Knowing sign language rather well, the teen hands Perry a quarter to try it out. Perry easily defeats the boss and a high score screen shows up. He signs back to the teen to type in his name. C-A-R-L. Leaving the arcade, the boys decide to try to get to know one another a little better.

Carl: How old are you?  
Perry: Thirteen.  
Carl: You look seven.  
Perry: So I'm short. Still thirteen.  
Carl: Your family signs?  
Perry: Yeah, does yours?  
Carl: My boss is my family. But yeah, he signs sometimes.  
Perry: What do you do?  
Carl: I'm an intern. You could maybe start training now if you meet my boss.  
Perry: What's his name?  
Carl: Major Monogram. What's your name?  
Perry: P-E-R-R-Y.  
Carl: Cool. Uh, are you a mute?  
Perry: No. Are you?  
Carl: No. People just can't understand me when I talk.  
Perry: Why not?  
Carl: My braces make me have the worst lisp known to man.  
Perry: Try me.  
Carl: I dunno.

Perry rolls his eyes and chirrs, startling the older boy. Perry's hand immediately flies to his mouth and he blushes a tad.

Perry: Sorry. That just happens sometimes.  
Carl: You sounded like a platypus just then.  
Perry: Weird. That's what my adoptive dad says.  
Carl: That'd be a cool nickname.  
Perry: What?  
Carl: P-E-R-R-Y the Platypus. It's got a nice ring.  
Perry: Right. (beat) You were gonna do the lisp?  
Carl: Right.

"Ochy, hyr guh nochen. I nay crr crr, chlks her hekchink ee wick I gay."

Perry: Good night, I something something, no idea what you said.  
Carl: Okay here goes. My name's C-A-R-L K-A-R-L, thanks for helping me with my game.  
Perry: No problem. Maybe you should stick to signing.

"Carl! There you are!" A booming voice interrupts the teens.

Carl: Sorry, Sir. I made a new friend.

The man raises an eyebrow. "Do you talk?"

Perry shakes his head.

Perry: No, but I sign. You must be Major Monogram. C-A-R-L has told me about you.  
Major: What has say C-A-R-L?  
Perry: You're his boss, he's an intern and I can train if I meet you.

The major looks to Carl for assistance. The intern pulls a notepad and pen from his pocket, translating the younger teen. The man nods, looking at Perry.

Major: How old are you, six?  
Perry: Thirteen.  
Major: Alright. Get permission from your parents.

He hands Perry a pamphlet and slip of paper for "Major M's School of Defense and Dance". Perry raises a suspicious eyebrow toward the man, but Carl grins and signs.

Carl: It's a cover story.  
Perry: Cool. When can I start?  
Carl: When you bring it back to the address in the booklet.  
Perry: Thanks.

After this, Perry starts training. He learns several forms of martial arts, and chirrs from excitement when he gets something accomplished. He becomes best friends with another thirteen-year-old kid from his neighborhood: Pinky Garcia-Shapiro. Pinky yips a lot, but is also fierce, earning the nickname "Pinky the Chihuahua", much like "Perry the Platypus." Pinky is shy around others and enjoys signing with Perry.

Three years later, Vanessa is fifteen. She is left to baby-sit seven-year-old Norm a lot when she comes over. Norm now lives with Heinz, since he works from his apartment. Heinz, try as Norm might, will never admit the tyke is his son. Heinz has becomes an "evil" scientist and is given his own nemesis: Perry the Platypus. Expecting a platypus, he is confused to instead find a teal-haired kid wearing a fedora.

"Who are you?"

Perry: P-E-R-R-Y.

"Hmm, I was expecting a platypus."

He chirrs and signs: It's a nickname.

"So, it's a nickname?" Heinz guesses.

Perry: You don't know sign language, do you?

In response, Heinz hands him a notepad and pen. Perry shakes his head in defeat and they begin a conversation. In a few months, Heinz starts trapping Perry and telling him backstories. Perry escapes and fights the scientist. Though they are supposed to be enemies, they seem to be becoming friends.

++ PRESENT DAY ++

Heinz is driving into the suburbs and has finally gotten an answer on the line. The woman sounds puzzled and tired.

"Heinz?"

Not bothering to stop for greetings, Heinz nearly growls. "What's this I hear about you moving?"

"Hold it, we broke up years ago, why does it"

"And had two kids together." He hisses, interrupting her. "Remember the contract?"

Her eyes widen and she drops the phone. Candace is upstairs; as is Lawrence. Perry sees that Linda dropped the phone and hands it to Phineas, while he goes to find Ferb to help Linda. Phineas looks up at his mom and then starts talking into the phone.

"Who is this?"

"Phineas, right?" Heinz groans, holding back his anger.

"Yeah. Who is"

"Tell your mother I'm five minutes away." Heinz hangs up the phone.

+++ How do you like it? Please review! +++ 


	2. Chapter 2

[[I still don't own these people. Here is chapter two.]]

Monogram has been hounding Carl to uncover exactly what his intern had disclosed to Doofenshmirtz. Getting nowhere, he decides to finally learn from the horse's mouth. He calls the DEI and at fist is surprised to hear a girl's voice on the other end.

"Vanessa?"

"Oh, hey, Major." Vanessa answers disinterestedly. "What is it now?"

"Carl told your dad something a little while ago"

"Yeah. Made him plenty pissed, too. I'm stuck here watching Norm and he's driving through the city."

"Driving?"

"Yeah. So, I guess he's gonna kick your intern's ass or something now."

"Oh yes. Just great."

Ferb has finally got Linda to speak coherent words. Lawrence and the rest of the family is downstairs in the living room, trying to get information from her. She opts for sign language, not trusting her mouth at the moment.

Linda: That was an old friend.  
Lawrence: What did your old friend say?  
Linda: He brought up a contract we signed years ago.  
Candace: I don't get it. You're worried about a contract?  
Phineas: What kind of contract?  
Linda: A custody contract.

There is a lull in conversation before Perry brings it back.

Perry: Anyone I know?  
Linda: I don't think so.  
Phineas: He said he's coming over.  
Linda: When?  
Phineas: Five minutes.  
Linda: Too soon.  
Lawrence: Would you like me to stay?  
Linda: Yes.  
Candace: What about us?  
Linda: Definitely.  
Ferb: Hold on. You said custody and we don't have any pets, so Linda: Yes, Ferb.  
Phineas: I don't get it.  
Candace: That guy on the phone is our dad.

Phineas breaks away, running to the backyard. Ferb chases after and Lawrence walks after, to keep an eye on the boys. Linda stays in the living room with Candace and Perry.

Candace: Where has he been all this time?  
Linda: Here. In Danville.  
Candace: Why hasn't he visited us?  
Linda: It's part of the contract.  
Candace: Does he know about Ferb and Perry?  
Linda: Yes, he sends gifts.  
Candace: Wait, he's our mystery gift giver? He's the one who bought me my car?  
Perry: And my moped?  
Linda: Yes, he was a very close friend with your mom, Perry.  
Perry: Really?

The conversation is cut short again, this time by an impatient knock at the front door. Lawrence and the boys are still out back. Candace is antsy about meeting her dad again, and, at the sound of the knock, she shoots upstairs to her room. Perry helps Linda to her feet and the duo answers the door.

"Hello, Linda."

He swallows thickly, staring at the seventeen-year-old (who looks like a twelve-year-old) beside her. The teen stares back with wide saucers, but Heinz breaks away first.

"Kylie's son?"

"Yes, Heinz. This is Perry."

Perry, still shocked, signs a hello. Heinz signs back, then turns to Linda.

"Did you send our kids away?"

"Candace is upstairs in her room. Phineas is in the back with Ferb and Lawrence."

"Do you plan on leaving with him?"

"I don't have a choice." She frowns. "I need the money as much as he does. Perry, will you show Heinz to Candace's room?"

He chirrs a little low but obliges. On the way upstairs, Perry grabs a pad of paper and writes to Heinz. 'Really? Of all the Lindas?'

Heinz signs: Maybe we should just sign this conversation.  
Perry: But you can't sign.  
Heinz: Really? Then what am I doing, Perry the Platypus?  
Perry: How long?  
Heinz shrugs: Since I was a kid. Your mom and I signed a lot when one of us had laryngitis or something.  
Perry: You're a jerk.  
Heinz: So? Does your family know how much you swear?  
Perry blanches: What about Vanessa? Does she know sign?  
Heinz: Dunno. Don't think so.  
Perry: That's a relief.  
Heinz: Norm knows, though. He's seen some stuff you say.  
Perry: Shit.  
Heinz: Yeah, he knows that one.  
Perry: This is Candy's room.  
Heinz: Thanks.

Taking in a deep breath, Heinz knocks on the door.

"Who is it?"

He sighs. "My name is Heinz."

Immediately the door is thrust open. She looks down at Perry, who signs: Yes, your dad. She grins a little, then notices Heinz signing as well.

Heinz: This is a little overwhelming, but I am your father.  
Candace: I'm C-A-N-D-A-C-E.  
Heinz: Yes, I know. I was there.  
Candace: Do you have any other kids besides Phineas and me?  
Heinz: Yes, I have another daughter.  
Candace: What's her name? How old is she?  
Heinz: Vanessa's your age.  
Candace: Hold on. What's your last name?  
Heinz: D-O-O-F-E-N-S-H-M-I-R-T-Z.

She jumps up. "Doofenshmirtz?"

"Hey, first try. Not bad."

"I know her. Phineas and I have already met her. She's come over here a few times. Wait, do you live in that purple skyscraper downtown that looks like Ferb's head?"

"Well, I don't know about Ferb's head, but I've always thought it looks like a pipe wrench."

"I've been there! How did I not see you?"

He shrugs. "I'm not supposed to have direct acknowledgement of either of you unless circumstance calls for it."

"What circumstance?"

"Uh, let's go downstairs and Linda and I can explain it to all of you."

A little later, Phineas is calmed down. Lawrence sits on the far edge. Phineas is beside him, then Ferb, Linda, Perry, Heinz and then Candace. Lawrence has already accepted the new job and the house that comes along with it. Linda has no choice but to move with him and Heinz isn't leaving Danville. Ergo, Candace and Phineas will be fully in Heinz's custody. Candace is nervously excited, and Phineas can't get over how much he looks like his dad.

"Ferb, Perry. I know this is hard for you." Linda sighs after a round of silence. "The two of you need to decide where you want to be. You can come with us or stay here in Danville. If you go with Heinz, know he isn't your father, just your guardian. If you want to come with us, you'll see Candace and Phineas about three to five times."

"A month?" Ferb asks worriedly.

"A year." Linda is holding back tears, but Heinz isn't relenting.

Ferb stands up. He walks to his dad and gives him a large, tearful hug. Lawrence knows what his son has decided, and why. Phineas and Ferb walks over to the other side of the living room, and the three kids stare at Perry to make his decision. He is very nervous about living with his nemesis, and worse about the man slipping up. He gazes tearfully at Linda and Lawrence and inches over to envelop them in a bittersweet embrace.

Perry: Write to us.  
Linda: Absolutely.  
Perry: I'll miss you.  
Linda: We'll miss you. All of you.  
Perry: Love you.  
Linda: Love you.  
Lawrence: Love you.

After the goodbyes, the kids pile into Heinz's van. Candace, Phineas and Ferb take the back and Perry climbs into the passenger seat. The ride back is a quiet one. They ride to the second top floor, which used to have three apartments but is now one large one. There are four bedrooms, though one is already taken. Candace takes the one on the far left side, Ferb takes the next one. The one between him and Phineas is already taken and its resident is asleep in his bed. Heinz tells Perry he will have the vacant room upstairs, and then he goes into the eight-year-old's room.

"Norm?" He calls out, shaking the bottom half of the bed.

"Hi, Daddy."

"I'm not your father." He groans. "But I do have more kids."

"More than Nessa?"

"Yes. There's Candace and Phineas. They'll be living here now. So will a green-haired boy named Ferb. And Perry."

"Mama's gonna live here?" He asks excitedly.

"Only if you don't call him that."

Norm signs: Shit.  
Heinz: And don't do that. Everyone here can sign.  
Norm: Not Nessa.  
Heinz: But everyone else.  
Norm: Okay.  
Heinz: Ready to meet them?  
Norm: Yeah!

Heinz is not surprised to find that Perry has taken his brothers and sister up a level. Perry, Phineas and Ferb are sitting on the couch. Candace and Vanessa are in the kitchen.

"What's up, Dad?"

"Norm, see those boys on the couch?"

"I see Mo-My friend Perry." He grins at his catch.

Heinz nods. "The redhead is Phineas and the other is Ferb. Go say hi."

Norm runs off and Heinz is left to face Vanessa and Candace. He looks over to Candace first. "I suppose you've told her everything?"

"I mean, Mom told me you had an affair but" Vanessa starts.

"Hold it!" Heinz shouts, mad at Charlene.

The kids in the living room jump in surprise. Candace and Vanessa's eyes widen, standing up a little straighter than before.

"I'm sorry, Vanessa, our marriage was in shambles before it even began. We were never actually married before you were born. Candace is three months older than you. We were already divorced when Phineas was born, so I never had an affair."

"Whoa." Phineas breaks the silence after a slow five minutes.

"Now," The doctor slowly exhales. "I'm with Vanessa every two weeks and Norm lives here. Last I seen Candace and Phineas, they were eight and two. And I see Perry every day. So, that leaves Ferb."

Sharp as a tack, Ferb counters the man. "Why do you see Perry every day?"

Perry tries desperately to make Heinz say something smart and not just ramble on like he is prone to. While struggling, he is shocked to hear what easily comes out of the doctor's mouth instead. 


	3. Chapter 3

[[Yeah, I left on a semi-cliffhanger, huh? AshesGleamandGlow, marigoldsandmerchants and multyfangirl18, thank you for reviewing. I'm finally out of school, clubs, and such so now I can go present shopping and back to typing up stories. Thank you, my readers, for sticking with me, considering last chapter's cliffhanger ended four months ago. Well, I still don't own it. Here comes Doctor D's quick thinking!]]

"I work at Major M's School of Defense and Dance. We're paired most of the time, considering the skill set."

"Impressive!" Phineas grins, looking over to his teal-haired brother.

Perry smiles with a bit of a bashful squirm to keep them from talking about it. Heinz then turns to the kitchen to start preparing lunch.

"What's for lunch today, Dad?" Vanessa asks, grabbing a magazine and sitting on the couch between Perry and Phineas.

Perry glances to the clock and subconsciously grabs the television remote off the coffee table, and switches on a Spanish soap opera. Ferb, sitting on one end of the couch, arches an eyebrow and Candace looks weirdly at Perry as she walks to the living room, taking a spot on the edge, next to Phineas. The teal-haired kid doesn't notice and is entranced by the screen. Heinz leaves the dinner cooking in the oven as he and Norm join the kids. Norm jumps up beside Ferb and Heinz slides into the last spot on the couch.

"What are we even watching?" Candace pipes up after a while.

Heinz, Perry, Norm and Ferb have their eyes glued to the set. Vanessa is reading her magazine. Simultaneously, Heinz, Norm, Ferb and Vanessa respond while Perry signs the same thing: "El Corazon del Fuego".

"Eh?" She still looks confused.

Phineas, who is distracted with a remote he had discovered, responds this time. "It means 'The Heart of Fire.' Doctor D, what does this do?"

He looks over with a worried look but smiles anyway. "It's a, It's a trap." Perry looks up then, but Heinz continues. "For a certain burglar."

"You have a modified trap for one burglar?" Phineas is astonished. "Why? Is he dangerous?"

"Damn panda." Norm and Perry can hear him harshly whisper through gritted teeth. "Yes, he's dangerous. He's attacked before and next time I'll be ready."

Phineas sets the remote down and turns back to the TV. The other sets of eyes follow in suit, aside from Heinz and Perry. They stand up and walk to the kitchen. Heinz starts working more on dinner, while Perry starts up a conversation.

Perry: Why do you leave things like that lying around?  
Heinz: Well excuse me, Platypus. I didn't know I was about to have permanent houseguests.  
Perry: How is this going to work?  
Heinz: I don't know but you better not get another nemesis.  
Perry: Newsflash! This isn't a school!  
Heinz: Not yet. Just wait till morning.

"Alright. Dinner's ready. Fettuccine alfredo with marinara."

While most of the kids are eager about the food, Candace lounges behind with a disturbed look on her face. "No way. I don't have any idea what"

Ferb cuts her off. "It's spaghetti with meat sauce."

"Oh." Candace blushes a bit, sitting at the table to eat.

Around nine pm, the kids on the second top floor are in their respective rooms. Candace is nailing and taping up pictures of Jeremy, Stacey and her parents all over the walls where there isn't a band or Ducky Momo poster. She places her most treasured teddy on the bookcase by the windowsill. Next door, Ferb has a lot of scientific items including his own miniature science lab unpacked around his room. The walls are bare, aside from a small panel of tarp covering the edges. Norm's room is a bit of a mess but he is very excited that his "mom" will be living with him. Phineas has blueprints and books cluttering his room. He is currently attempting to hook up his sick day gaming system, since he no longer lives in the same neighborhood as Isabella and crew.

Upstairs, in the lab, Heinz is deftly constructing a form of dance studio crossed with a classroom. Vanessa is up there with him, having been read in on the whole situation. Now with a much clearer headspace, she is working on some machine while simultaneously calling a number of people. Down in Perry's bedroom, the teal-haired teen is sitting on his bed. For the most part, his things are left untouched. The rest of their things will be coming tomorrow, they were informed earlier during dinner.

Perry starts writing in his journal. It is an old, tattered thing and he hasn't had a need to write in it since he signed up with Monogram. How things could possibly get worse or more confusing, Perry is at a loss. Sneaking out every day to fight a scientist across town and be back by snack time in the afternoon had been difficult enough. Now, he will be living with his nemesis.

"What am I going to do? Dr. D, no Heinz, may still be my nemesis but now he is also my guardian. Will the attacks stop? Cause to be honest, I actually find them pretty fun at times. I don't care much for all the inators, but sometimes he really tells all in his backstories and I've begun to see him in a new light. Maybe I'm just overthinking things. For the longest time, I was terrified to tell him who I am and who my family is. But, surely he wouldn't hurt his own flesh and blood. Right? He loves his daughter and gets angry if anyone hurts her. I've seen that piranha tank he built for Clingy Johnny.

Oh, God. Ferb. I know Ferb likes Vanessa. Even though Ferb is under Heinz's guardianship here, I'm sure Vanessa comes first, since she is his biological daughter. I hope everything goes smooth with Ferb and Vanessa. If not, then Heinz might build something to attack Ferb, and then Phineas and I and maybe Candace would attack Heinz, and then, and then, and then . I'm not even sure. No one would win. That's a scary thought. No. I'm sure things will go well. I just have to find out tomorrow."

Early the next morning, around six am, Perry's watch communicator goes off. The teen wakes with a startle before clicking it on. Monogram appears on the little screen, demanding a recap on what he knows. Perry stares blankly. Then he removes the watch and starts signing to the major.

Perry: Things are going weird with the family but I'll still be able to fight Doofenshmirtz.

"Yes, I see that. You're in his apartment."

Perry's eyes widen at that statement: You tracked me?

"Uh, um, Squirrelly intern!"

Carl appears next to him, grumbling. "The name is Carl. You're gonna have to learn that, you know."

Perry raises an eyebrow at the strangeness: Do I have a mission?

"What did he say?" Carl looks over to Monogram.

Perry: Hold on! Who are you? The truth.

"He asked if he had a mission." Monogram explains to Carl. "What do you mean 'who am I?'"

Perry: Well you're not Major Monogram. And you're definitely not Carl. What's going on here?

The screen fuzzes a little and then comes back clear with Heinz and Vanessa staring back. Perry raises his eyebrows higher if at all possible. Vanessa shakes her head and walks away while Heinz continues to smile.

"Gotta ask. How did you know I wasn't Monobrow? It was not remembering the intern's name, wasn't it?"

Perry shakes his head: He's done that before, actually. No, you know sign language and Vanessa doesn't. But Monogram is the one who doesn't know much sign, and Carl's an expert at it.

"Go figure." Heinz shrugs. "Well, come up to the lab. Class is about to start."

Perry sighs and then grabs his watch and hat. He runs into Phineas and Candace along the way. He freezes a little, unsure of what to do or say. Luckily, Phineas starts signing, beating him to it.

Phineas: Hey, Per. Me, Ferb and Norm are gonna go to the park today. We got some new idea about lasagna!  
Candace: Stacey and I are going to the movies. The new Ducky Momo musical is out.  
Perry: Sounds like fun. I'll see you guys later.  
Candace: Have fun at the defense and dance class.  
Phineas: Yeah, it looks like fun. I'd join but Dr. D says it's for level ten and up. You must be real good at it.  
Perry: Thanks, I'm alright. Bye!

Perry sighs in relief once they disappear down the hall. Perry climbs in the elevator, knowing it isn't really run down, taking it to the rooftop. Upon arriving, he has to just stop and stare. Some of his friends from the agency are there, along with some of Vanessa's friends. Pinky is in shackles, standing next to Vanessa's pink-haired friend Lacie. Johnny is in shackles next to Vanessa, Chester is in shackles next to Monty Monogram. There are a few other like this, Perry muses as he walks out toward Dr. Doofenshmirtz. As expected, he falls into a trap, leaving him with similar shackles.

"Alright, welcome to Major M's School of Defense and Dance." A voice appears over a loudspeaker. "For the sake of things, all of you are on level ten, but Perry and Heinz are on level twelve. You have ten minutes to fight. And go."

As the whistle blows, Vanessa is the first to strike. Still angry over Johnny, she easily takes out her frustration, while he simply tries crawling away to hide. He gets his chance when Pinky sends Lacie crashing into Vanessa. Chester helps Johnny, but Perry and Heinz are squared off against one another. Even when Monty flies between them, they aren't concerned with him. They keep their coordination on each other and continue to fight. At the five-minute mark, Vanessa wins over Johnny and Pinky wins over Lacie. Several others, in fact, almost all others, win one way or another within the allotted ten minutes time.

Perry and Heinz are still the only ones fighting. Perry discovers that without the aid of an inator, the two are actually very competent, competitive fighters. They aren't fighting to their full capacity, Perry also takes the time to note. He never really wants to hurt Heinz, and he feels that the doctor thinks the same way. Though it is over the time limit, the duo continues to fight and the others watch in amazement. Heinz notices, though, out of the corner of his eyes, Johnny getting too friendly. His shackles are still on, but he trying to hold onto Vanessa. Suddenly, Heinz stops, placing his hand out to stop Perry. The teen does so, having to fall back to avoid an uncomfortable situation.

The crowd notices the darkening of the scientist's eyes as he marches over. Vanessa is trying to push Johnny away, but the punk wants to be around her. Heinz harshly grabs Johnny's shirt, dragging him away. Perry starts to follow, terrified of what Heinz may do. It is answered however, when the doctor walks over to the edge of the building.

"I saw what you were doing to my daughter." Heinz talks very low and calm.

"I love her."

"No, you don't." He snaps, shoving Johnny lightly, but keeping a grip on the back of his shirt. "If you did love her, you would listen to her."

"Dad?" Vanessa calls out worriedly. "What are you doing?"

"Vanessa, sweetie, will you please take all our guests to the parking lot?" The question is innocent, but his voice is angrier than Perry has heard.

She takes a look at the scene before her and quickly leads the rest down the stairs. Once everyone but Heinz, Johnny, Perry and she are left, she calls back out to her dad. "Dad, be careful. You've got more responsibilities now."

She tries to sound demanding, but it only comes out as a young child reminding her dad that there are others around. He relents a little as she closes the door. Perry lets out one of his nervous little chatters and Johnny tries to back away with no avail. The teen is standing on the edge, leaning toward the ground, only still up here because of the grip Heinz's titanium arm has on the back of his stained shirt.

"So, are you going to stay away from Vanessa?"

"Yes!"

"If you see her in public, are you going to respect her wishes?"

"Yes!"

"Are you going to come anywhere near this building?"

"Yes, I mean no! No!"

Heinz droops his arm a little, causing Johnny to flail a little more. Only the tips of his shoes are now touching the roof. Suddenly, the doctor reels back and Johnny does a backward somersault onto the roof. Reassuring himself that he is alive, Johnny does not look back toward Heinz or Perry as he races down the stairs.

Perry: Would you have actually thrown him over?  
Heinz: I taught him a lesson.  
Perry: But you wouldn't have actually thrown him over?  
Heinz: Don't speculate, Perry. If my daughter gets hurt, Hell will break loose.

While Perry had been at class, Phineas and Ferb had been in the park with Norm, attempting to make a thought machine. The end result is a helmet that works by inserting a penny. For each penny deposited, a slip of paper is ejecting from the helmet, telling one's thoughts. Ferb places the helmet on Norm's head.

"The best thing to eat in the morning are waffles." Phineas smiles. "What do you think?"

A ding is heard and a slip of paper falls out of the helmet. The redhead takes it with a grin, excited to find if it works. "Norm says, 'I like muffin time.' No argument there." Phineas laughs.

Ferb gives a thumbs-up. The boys trade the helmet around, having the most fun out of getting a penny for their thoughts. Meanwhile, down at the movies, there are only four tickets left available. Just as Stacey and Candace get to the window, the ticket teller says the movie was just sold out, pointing to who bought the tickets. Candace's eyes widen, but the person in question is standing in front of her in no time.

"Hey, Candace. I saw you in line earlier and I noticed the movie was getting sold out." Jeremy holds out two tickets.

"Jeremy? How did you know which movie I was going to see?"

He looks down at the girl's shirt, where it reads "I 3 Ducky Momo" in big, sparkly letters. Candace chuckles sheepishly and Stacey shakes her head. She takes the ticket with a slightly raised eyebrow.

"You're gonna see Ducky Momo?"

He shrugs. "It's Suzy's favorite. She's already inside with some of her friends."

"Suzy has friends?" Candace asks under her breath.

"What?"

"I said, do you wanna sit with us?"

"Sure. I've gotta keep an eye on Suzy anyway. I'll go get some popcorn and cokes."

"Cool artichokes!"

"Artichokes, really?" Stacey smirks.

Candace shrugs. Taking a coke each, the girls and Jeremy follow the music.

Ducky Mo Ducky Momo Ducky Mo Ducky Momo Ducky Mo Ducky Momo He's your very best friend!

[[I am sorry I don't have more. I didn't really know where to end this chapter. I suddenly was inspired to write this little nugget. Then, in a flash, it was gone again. Oh well, maybe something will help me bring it back to life. Please review!]]  



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